From the Womb of God

Translator's Note

This is my English translation of a Nepali short story originally written in 2009. This story was included in my first book, Mimosa. The original text was composed in Nepali and carries with it the philosophical depth, poetic sensibility, and cultural nuances characteristic of early 21st-century Nepali literary fiction. In translating this work, I have endeavored to preserve the lyrical quality of the prose, the ambiguous nature of its narrative structure, and the interweaving of magical realism with intimate character study.

The story explores themes of artistic creation, love, solitude, and the mysterious boundaries between reality and imagination—themes that transcend linguistic and cultural borders. While some idioms and cultural references specific to Nepal have been adapted for English-speaking readers, I have maintained the essential spirit and meaning of the original work.



This story gains its hopeful shape through certain characters who come near the protagonist.

Charlain (Charleen): A man who works in the narrator's kitchen. He watches more films than necessary, participates in theatrical productions, and remains completely absorbed in his terrible ideas about making cinema. While he has spare time after making tea, coffee, and bread, he spends it imagining horrific characters. When the narrator occasionally sees him boiling milk, he claims he's cleaning the painting of the "green lady." He knows that "green lady" is an important painting hung on the protagonist's wall. The rest of the story the narrator reveals bit by bit.

Scold Lady: An old woman who is the protagonist's first neighbor. She scolds almost everyone—the milkman, the half-heartedly clean woman who comes to collect waste, and the utility worker who comes to check the electricity and water meters. This quarrelsome woman fights with almost everyone, yet she always invites the protagonist to play piano at her Friday evening dance gatherings.

Lucian: Lucian Monte speaks Nepali quite well, but when he meets people from his community, he's found speaking Newari. This man lives in an old bungalow to the left of the protagonist's residence, where one can see him polishing a 1960s Mercedes. From the protagonist's room, one can easily see his motor garage. Right now he's looking toward the protagonist's window. The protagonist plans to take Virginia in Lucian's Mercedes to the Valley of the Loire.

Virginia Dickenson: She arrived to stay in a small but magnificent cottage across the main road. She has rented this cottage from Théo. She came here for her new novel. She will stay here until the novel is finished. The scold lady mentioned this at yesterday's dance gathering.



This is today's date. This is the day the protagonist was told to narrate the story. Today is the day after the dance gathering. Yesterday evening until late, the protagonist was playing piano in scold lady's house, so the protagonist is still in bed. Without his presence, the story cannot be favorable. First he must wake up—but this task will be performed by Lucian. When Lucian coughs and the 1960s Mercedes coughs out a disgusting sound, the hero of the story will wake up. Standing by the window, he will look at Lucian. He will imagine taking Virginia in his Mercedes to the Valley of the Loire. Virginia lives in the cottage visible from his front window. She keeps two white spaniels. She is busy writing novels all day. This is a peaceful place. We can clearly see (date palm trees, mulberry trees, walnut trees, palm trees) planted around her cottage. Writers enjoy peace. They love to be isolated in a way. Perhaps the protagonist thought she came seeking the same thing. But at yesterday's dance gathering, scold lady told the protagonist: "She has come to live here separated from her husband."

Charleen enters the room with a cup of coffee. Then he leaves again. He returns with bread and eggs. They sit drinking coffee. The room is not painted. Faded red bricks seem covered by an oil painting of a naked woman's beautiful form—covered by a bra—standing in an elegant pose. The protagonist paints all day. Sometimes he writes poems for Virginia, and all these things are happening nowadays. Perhaps if the present ever remained, this is all he would do. He is an artist, not a narrator or poet. Yet these seemingly trivial tasks for Virginia are quietly happening these days.

Charleen is silent. He's not talking about any films. He's not telling stories of horror he's created. He doesn't do the strange things that seemed to possess him last night—neither vampire nor alien attacks. He simply puts pieces of bread in his mouth without speaking. The protagonist is also drinking coffee. He looks at the "green lady" painting hung on the wall. A woman stands in a green ball gown. She appears eager to escape.

Charleen leaves with an empty coffee mug. The protagonist suspects that his silence means he's coming with some horrific story. The "green lady" has stepped out of the painting and now stands before the protagonist, ready to argue.

The protagonist looks at the green lady. Her eyes are moist.

"Marry again," says the green lady.

"This is not possible. You can't force me," says the protagonist.

"It is possible. Don't keep yourself confined in small theories. A second marriage is possible. You have kept me hung on this wall for years," says the green lady.

"Camellia, this is not possible," says the protagonist.

The protagonist reaches to embrace her. She frees herself from his arms and says, "Go. Virginia is waiting for you."

Now he is at scold lady's house. Sitting on the sofa, he drinks green coffee. "Green coffee"—perhaps one can sense the future. A white dog sometimes jumps in scold lady's lap, sometimes on the black coffee table. Scold lady sometimes doesn't seem quarrelsome to him. She is composed. The protagonist feels there is depth in her laughter. Her face certainly looks like that of a quarrelsome woman, but she stands at the door every Friday to welcome everyone at the dance gathering. She remembers whether wine glasses are in everyone's hands or not. She wishes there be no shortcoming in her hospitality.

This process had been happening since before the protagonist entered her neighborhood. No one then knew who played the piano. On days other than Friday, too, she looks at the protagonist emotionally and sometimes urges him to play piano. The protagonist is playing. Charule is still on the coffee table. Scold lady signals the protagonist to play. The dog goes to the piano and stands. Scold lady stands before a mirror and looks at herself from the waist to the chest. She runs her hands around her neck and breasts. She imagines her youth. The piano continues playing. If it had been Friday, perhaps people would have seen her dancing. No one would have seen her. She would have felt completely alone before the mirror. At such a moment, the protagonist knows what music to play. The stages of love's development—solitude, love letters, romance, joy, and suffering—he busies himself filling the piano's melody with all these states.

Scold lady had married. She fell in love with many men in her youth. She believed in love but thought it wrong to marry and bear children. Before sleeping, she would think about religious sons or daughters and wake up chattering, pushing that thought away from her busy mind. She felt every day was loving. She would one day give herself to a man and say: "Forgive me, this was not the first night I spent with you, but truly those later nights were more excellent than this." "Your lip-biting techniques have tempted me." After this, she would emerge from what seemed like a strange man friend's room and the next day, when riding a train from Sammurué to Lennon, she would tell of falling in love with another man. She is now old. In the lines of her aged cheeks, we can still see some images of youth. The protagonist thinks that when he plays piano, the old woman thinks of such things. Indeed, old time has cut sharply. She perhaps busies herself filling the piano with good melody.

Charule begins to bark. Suddenly all is silent. Scold lady looks toward the door. The protagonist also turns toward the door, but his fingers are still visible on the piano keys.

"Welcome to you," scold lady says with eastern enthusiasm, inviting Virginia inside.

The protagonist also stands up and begins a first direct introduction with her.

"I am the protagonist," says the protagonist, politely extending his hand.

"I am Virginia Dickenson," she says with a light smile.

Now the three sit on the velvet sofa behind the piano. Virginia is not very heavy. She appears attractive. Pearl earrings hanging from her ears enhance her natural beauty. A delicate locket hanging from the center of her chest has Krishna's face engraved on it. It's now approaching noon. Scold lady enters the room with organic coffee. Her Charule comes padding behind her.

"You know he's a good piano player," says scold lady, encouraging the protagonist and telling Virginia.

"I heard him last night," says Virginia.

"Ah, thank you," says the protagonist, falling silent.

Virginia begins to look at him. The protagonist wonders how to make a girl like him on their first meeting. The protagonist begins to like her. He remembers Lucian's Mercedes. He remembers the Valley of the Loire. He imagines holding her hands. He begins to imagine wanting to bear children with her.

"Did you start your novel?" asks scold lady, breaking the silence.

"I've only prepared my pen," she says and begins to laugh. She laughs at her own small jokes. She lights a cigarette and sprawls on the sofa, sipping. She likes abstract paintings. She feels that looking at a quiet painting before sitting down to write is a literary experience. Théo has arranged the paintings for her. There is Théo's art gallery not far from the cottage. Virginia stands up from the sofa to leave. Now the protagonist's eyes are caught by her white, restless ankle in her pedal. He wants to love Virginia. He wants to express his love, but as if understanding the appropriate moment, he remains quiet now.

"Do you like white wine?" Virginia asks the protagonist.

"Certainly, I do like it," he answers softly.

"With salmon fish," says Virginia, asserting her privilege as an ordinary woman would.

"Of course, you are welcome at my cottage," says the protagonist.

Virginia uses her privilege. She leaves. Charule begins to bark again, as if he too wants to stop Virginia. Now only the protagonist and scold lady remain in the room. Scold lady looks at the protagonist and smiles as if she understands something.

The protagonist leaves because he needs to harmonize with the evening's invitation. He leaves scold lady's house with a lightened heart. His heart is serene, seeing the flowers in the garden outside. Only a few people are seen on the street. Almost all are slightly fair-complexioned. No one like Charleen is visible. People with chests as broad and lips as coarse as his are rare here. The protagonist knows he will keep Virginia happy. If all goes well, the evening gathering will also be thrilling. The touch of her soft hands will stir the flow in his body, and surely it will arouse sexual excitement. He remembers the ball gown's green lady. He has a faint recollection of what she said these days: "Go, Virginia is waiting for you."

The protagonist stands outside Virginia's cottage. He looks toward Lucian's garage. Lucian is not visible in the afternoon. Perhaps no one knows where he disappears to in the afternoon. He is a man of misfortune. He takes the life of decorum as his ideal. He takes love with great faith and respect. His mother too was in love with a businessman and Lucian was born before marriage. That's why his own birth seems immoral and unethical to him, though he openly tells about his faith in religion. The protagonist looks at the colorfully painted Mercedes and becomes optimistic that the Valley of the Loire plan will happen soon.

The protagonist first tells Charleen about what Virginia invited him for at dinner. He hurries into his room. The green lady painting has stepped out. "This is what should have happened," the green lady says, looking at the protagonist.

"You're telling me to do this?" says the protagonist emotionally.

"He will give you children. You have always desired this. Isn't that right, protagonist?" The green lady tries to make him understand reality.

The green lady in the painting belongs to his celestial wife, Camellia Woolf. It's been a long time since he married her. Later, she surely died from some unknown disease. Then the protagonist came here and began painting. When he first came here, his neighbors called him uncivilized. The green lady is an excellent painting he created. It is both familiar and strange. He can talk to it. The green lady can talk to him, and every night they have imagined their honeymoon night together.

The protagonist lights a cigarette. The green lady painting has returned. Charleen enters. Something seems to have happened. After gasping for a while, he begins to speak.

"Protagonist, do you know?" asks Charleen.

"What?" asks the protagonist briefly.

"I've found a character for my film. I've given it a name. It's a creature that comes from secluded places. It's 'gull-azmir.' You can call it by that name," says Charleen, telling everything in one breath.

"Gull-azmir? What kind of name is this?" asks the protagonist, playing with his long unwashed nose.

"Ah! Aren't you surprised too?" says Charleen, turning to the protagonist in amazement.

"You know, this will make waves in the cinema world," says Charleen.

"But..." the protagonist begins looking at Charleen's excited eyes.

"Certainly people will like it. May gull-azmir be immortal in history," says Charleen, hurrying out of the room.

Charleen only thinks of making such stories. Only on days when he hasn't thought of such stories does he not boil milk. The protagonist doesn't get to tell about Virginia.

"Good evening," says Lucian, greeting the protagonist with relative civility.

"Good evening, Lucian," says the protagonist.

"Tell me if you want my car key. Look, isn't it cool to make love?" Lucian always reminds the protagonist about the Valley of the Loire when he sees him.

"Thank you," says the protagonist.

Seeing the protagonist in a hurry, Lucian smiles on the top of his head, saying, "It works."

The protagonist first goes to the flower shop on the mountain road and buys a bunch of white flowers meant for friendship. He now goes directly to Virginia's cottage. He will spend an important evening there. He will make strong efforts to prevent his feet from trembling. He enters through the main door of the cottage.

Virginia is playing with her spaniels. "Welcome, protagonist," says Virginia.

"Thank you," he says, giving her the bunch of flowers.

They pass through a long soft corridor to the main living room. In between is a large royal bed. Green curtains. Nepali carpet. Pieces of old European furnishings are arranged on both sides of the royal bed. The living room appears very beautiful and luxurious. Claude Monet's "Impression Sunrise" is hung directly in front of the royal bed. On another wall, "Women in Green Dress" was hanging.

"Your introduction—painter or pianist, what should I call you?" Virginia asks the protagonist.

"Painter. You can call me a painter. Pianist only for the dance gathering," he answers, looking at the room panoramically.

Based on the combination of paintings hung in the room and the basis of color, the protagonist speaks. "You are peace-loving. Ah, a very clean mind. That must be peaceful."

"How could you tell that?" she asks, turning her diary in which she was writing her novel.

"The presence of colors speaks of your introduction or qualities," says the protagonist, speaking like a prophet.

"Absolutely, you're right," begins Virginia.

"I have an aspiration for peace and companionship. I feel my characters should be born from such places. You must understand. As Virginia Woolf said in 'A Room of One's Own': 'A woman must have money and a room of her own if she is to write fiction.'... Yes, I have a room now and money. You must believe I sacrificed my husband for this much."

"Don't think this way. Solitude alone will consume you like a serpent," says the protagonist.

"A serpent?" asks Virginia.

"Yes, like a serpent. In solitary circumstances, you can only become a serpent. You need love. You need a male character," says the protagonist, taking one of Virginia's hands.

He tries to show his love. He wants to tell Virginia everything. He wants to propose marriage. Virginia pours wine. The salmon fish preparation appears special. Virginia turns on the music player. Melody composed by Chopin and Schumann begins to fill the room. Time seems suspended. Like a couple in a love story.

"You know, Virginia?" the protagonist begins to speak, looking at her.

"Time abandons you. There is no value of time," he says.

The protagonist doesn't care much about the passage of time. He is a being who doesn't care about time in a certain way. He has a wrong idea that time comes, goes, and changes. He knows people don't use time well. And they misinterpret time.

"Would you like to hear the novel I've started?" she says, becoming ready to narrate.

"Absolutely, absolutely. All right. White wine, salmon fish, and a novel," says the protagonist, raising his glass for a toast.

In the background, Schumann's melody plays thinly again. Virginia begins her story...


THE MYSTERIOUS DEVELOPMENT

Between this and Virginia and the protagonist's closeness, encounters begin. "White wine, salmon fish, and a novel." Before Virginia begins her story, the protagonist raises the glass in this same way. There is a physical relationship between them. The protagonist has already told Virginia about the plan to tour the Valley of the Loire in Lucian's Mercedes. Virginia has said she will complete the novel toward the end of the year and go to the Valley of the Loire in early spring. They made love last night.

Eleven months later...

The protagonist hurriedly enters Virginia's cottage. Some unknown curiosity has brought him here. It seems Charleen's gull-azmir has been chasing him. He enters Virginia's large living room. She is not there. The living room is empty and seems covered with cheerless melody. Schumann's tune is not playing. "Impression Sunrise" sits on the wall like waiting for a miraculous morning. In recent days, his hobby was to paint pictures of fair-skinned children to hang on the wall. The protagonist has visited Théo's art gallery many times to get those paintings. Virginia had finished her novel yesterday and said she would hold a grand ceremony today. But there was no bustle here. Something strange has just happened. The protagonist arrived at the cottage a few moments before the scheduled time to tell about it.

The protagonist goes to Virginia's bed. He picks up the diary in which Virginia was writing her novel and begins to read the final and remaining parts of the novel...

(The text describes their relationship. Virginia became pregnant. Eleven months had passed since they planned the Valley of the Loire tour. Virginia said she would complete the novel this month and they would go on their spring tour. In recent times, Virginia had begun taking the protagonist to Théo's art gallery and scold lady's dance gatherings together. The protagonist has been shortening his conversations with the green lady since the day they became close. Lately, the protagonist doesn't talk to the green lady. The protagonist has recently started a new painting called "God's Hand." At Virginia's request, he started this painting on a theme that mankind's welfare can come only from God's hand. The story takes a strange turn. The protagonist will wake up a bit early today, perhaps. He has already requested coffee from Charleen. Virginia is to attend a grand ceremony today. He is in a hurry to reach the cottage. He calls Charleen for coffee again. The protagonist looks toward the green lady painting. For the first time, he notices that the woman's belly in the painting has grown. He tries to remember. He knows he never created it this way.

"This is strange," the protagonist removes his eyes from the painting.

Charleen hasn't arrived yet with the coffee. There is no sound from the kitchen...)

The protagonist's hand drops the diary to the floor.

"This was a predetermined story, then?" the protagonist questions himself.

From a nearby cot comes the sound of a baby crying. The vagitus was extraordinarily beautiful. Suddenly Schumann's composition begins playing and the baby's crying mingles with it, spreading throughout the royal room from all directions. The protagonist clearly feels strange sensations. Perhaps like readers in confusion, the protagonist too is confused. This is severe doubt. This is delusion. The baby's crying becomes thicker. Virginia, scold lady, Lucian mysteriously disappear. This baby should have been born from the green lady's womb long ago. Virginia left this gift today.

The protagonist is far from reality. Perhaps Virginia never told him about this. But Virginia's love and this gift will remain forever. The protagonist feels Virginia's emblem throughout the room. It seems this child is born from God's womb—the first child of the earth.

The protagonist picks up the baby and presses it to his chest, thanking God, and leaves the imaginary cottage of Virginia, stepping into the long peace after the colony's war.


EPILOGUE

And so, standing in a long period of recovery after colonial warfare...